The 10 Worst Series of the 21st Century’s First Decade

How do I limit myself?! I could easily make this a worst 100 list, with all the reality shows, bloviating Fox News opinion makers and shows so horrible they lasted less than three weeks. To pare it down, I have limited myself to the most notorious examples – series that were briefly popular for the wrong reason, inexplicably stayed on the air despite public disdain, or served as examples of especially troubling programming decisions. As with my picks for the 10 best list, this applies only to series that have debuted since 2000, and counts down in reverse order, with the worst of the worst at #1 – and #10 being a three-way tie. Yes, the decade was that bad.

10) My Big Fat Obnoxious Fiancé/Boss/Greek Life (2003-2004): Three different lousy series all based off the title of one surprise hit movie – what a testament to bad programming. Life was the first one, a TV continuation of the inspiration of it all, the 2002 hit film My Big Fat Greek Wedding. Unfortunately star/creator Nia Vardalos had nothing much more to say despite including most of her movie cast on the series, and the result was a quickly receding mess. For Fiancé, actors were hired to con a poor woman into convincing her family she had to wed an irritating man quickly in order to claim a million dollar prize, when in fact he and others were actors hired to push her buttons to see if she would go through with the ceremony. Charming, huh? Boss was more of the same in an office setting, but while viewers were moderately in its predecessor, the sheer classlessness of the whole enterprise was now in full view, and it went off in five weeks as audiences wised up and tuned out.

9) The Anna Nicole Show (2002-2004): It’s always a given when a celebrity does a reality show that his or her career is on the decline and they are desperate for attention. None was more pathetic than this one, detailing the boring daily activities a busty blonde who was obviously on medication along with her hangers-on. This was a program without a purpose except exploitation, and just sad in light of Nicole’s decline and death shortly thereafter.

8) The Jay Leno Show (2009-present): No other series has done more to jeopardize the viability of a network than this one. NBC started with the stupid idea to get rid of Leno as host of The Tonight Show despite him leading the late night wars and was desperate enough to keep him on it at any cost. The result was this nightly mishmash of warmed-over elements from his previous show, listlessly presented by all involved even though pre-show publicity claimed it would revolutionize the industry. Instead, it has struggled just to earn a meager 1.5 rating promised to advertisers even against reruns and has become the joke of the industry while dragging down ratings for NBC affiliates whose news shows follow it. Meanwhile, Leno and company make only the slightest changes to improve it. When NBC meets with station heads in 2010, it will be interesting to see if there is a mutiny on how this is dragging the fourth-place network down even further and affecting them negatively. Right now, it’s just embarrassing to watch.

7) According to Jim (2001-2009): ABC’s longest-running sitcom of the era by far spent eight painful years on the air while never finishing in the top 40 any of those years, which must be a record for an entertainment series on a major network. I have no idea why or how it happened either, other than maybe middle-aged, out-of-shape ABC executives wanted to identify with star Jim Belushi having a beautiful wife. This was a prime example of why sitcoms fell out of grace with much of the public this decade.

6) The Bionic Woman (2007): I had to include one of the disasters from Ben Silverman’s era of mismanagement at NBC from 2007 to 2009, and there could be no better example than this unworthy revival. Lead actress Michelle Ryan tried an unconvincing American dialect while appearing in limp adventures. It was all unnecessary and forgettable, but it did not stop Silverman from doing similarly poor remakes in the future, such as Knight Rider and the upcoming and likely-to-bomb Parenthood.

5) The Bachelor/Bachelorette (2002–present): Forget about gay marriage – the real threat to heterosexual unions is watching this collection of narcissists attempt to woo a member of the opposite sex and wind up being the chosen one for a wedding that usually never occurs after each session ends. The participants are chosen for their looks above all else, with personalities designed to clash secondarily in the mix. It all resembles a bad night at a singles bar, and its incredible and enduring popularity mystifies me, as well as irks plenty of people because it set the template for way too many similar shallow dating shows that cluttered the airwaves after it debuted (remember Joe Millionaire and Temptation Island, among others?).

4) Father of the Pride (2004): NBC made the unprecedented slide from first to fourth place in the 2004-2005 season (and has stayed there ever since) thanks in part to this stupid series that filled the slot that Frasier previously held, if you can believe that. A cartoon with adult jokes focused on the home life of the lions used in performance by Las Vegas stars Siegfried and Roy, this was one show designed with absolutely no one in mind to watch, and somehow cost $1.6 million per episode without looking like it did. What a genuine waste of time and money.

3) Til Death (2006-present): Brad Garrett and Joely Fisher, two genuinely appealing actors, are forced to play the most unpleasantly arguing married couple ever in TV history, with lame scenarios and tired insults standard parts of every episode. This is one of those sitcoms where everyone appears to be going through the motions with little effort invested, and I have yet to read or hear from anybody who is a fan of it. Nevertheless, Fox appears intent on keeping on air at least through 2010 so it produces enough shows to be sold into daily repeats on local stations. Executives there apparently forgot people have to want to watch a series for that to be successful.

2) Big Brother (2000-present): The worst recurring summer replacement series ever, Big Brother puts lots of vain and/or conniving young people into a house with cameras located everywhere and records every navel-gazing moment, trying to edit them into something fascinating to watch in three installments per week. There are competitions to see who is in control of putting up two members to be considered for eviction every week, and general strategizing about forming alliances with various members, trying to make sure your lies do not come back to haunt you. As a model for human behavior, the terms “respect” and “decency” are nowhere to be found while the group hopes to survive for the $500,000 top prize, and often there is verbal and even physical abuse between houseguests. Watching the squalor with a disinterested eye at all times is hostess Julie Chen, the most unemotional and detached emcee ever. The notion that she could do such a show while at the same time report for The Early Show on CBS would be inexplicable were it not known that her husband is Les Moonves, president of CBS. She might impress you, Les, but not the rest of us – nor this alleged excuse for entertainment, for that matter.

1) Fear Factor (2001-2006): An utterly repellent do-anything-for-a-buck show, this competition degraded every involved in it by requiring contestants to eat unappetizing food, endure mental and/or physical anguish, and just in general suffer in public in hopes of winning cash. Host Joe Rogan added to the air of indifference to what this show did to its participants. Its temporary success indicated that NBC was no longer going to pursue classy programming the way it did in the 1990s, and it let producers know that it was pretty much anything goes in treating players in reality shows as long as it titillated viewers. The result is some of the worst programs in TV history littered across the airwaves nowadays. Thanks for bringing us back to the days of lions attacking Christians in Rome, Fear Factor.